Brexit the Fourth
Britain’s vote to leave the EU has been variously described as “an unprecedented geopolitical shift”, an “earthquake”, and even “the stupidest thing any country has ever done”. Are such characterisations fair? Is the country’s vote to leave really so unprecedented? Not a bit of it. Britain has a long and distinguished history of departing from the European continent. In fact, the current Brexit is no less than the fourth overall.
The most recent Brexit took place between 26 May and 4 June 1940, and is better known by its popular name, The Miracle of Dunkirk.
Through an extraordinary logistical effort (involving a large flotilla of civilian craft — the much-cherished Little Ships of Dunkirk), Old Blighty managed to rescue more than three hundred thousand British and Commonwealth troops, who had found themselves stranded on a beach in Northern France. Unfortunately, this Brexit — like the current one — saddled the country with a rather hefty divorce bill. Britain was forced to leave behind 2,500 field guns, 20,000 motorcycles, and almost 65,000 other vehicles, as well as large quantities of precious fuel and ammunition.
The next most recent Brexit occurred in the year of Our Lord 1534, when His Majesty King Henry VIII decided to take England out of the Roman Catholic Church, thereby restoring Royal Supremacy.
In the years leading up to this Brexit, the English economy had become increasingly hamstrung by bureaucratic rules and regulations emanating from unelected bishops in the Holy See. The most encumbering of these was a directive stipulating that Kings of Albion had no right to divorce their European-born wives, which was naturally seen by all good Englishmen as an affront to their ancient liberties. Indeed, as the eminent historian Thomas Arthur Russell notes, King Henry’s decision “was part of the English desire to be independent from continental Europe religiously and politically”.
The oldest (and therefore original) Brexit happened slightly longer ago.
It began around 10,000 BC, when Britain opted to close its borders by flooding Doggerland, the only land bridge to the European continent. Negotiations for this Brexit were, frustratingly, rather drawn out. It is believed to have taken several thousand years for the final deal — a comprehensive moat around the island of Britain — to be agreed by the two sides. However, once the new relationship was up and running, it not only meant migrants could be selected according to a fair Australian-style points system, but also allowed the country to take back control of its previously desiccated fishing waters.
So there you have it. Britain’s vote to leave the EU is decidedly not without precedent. The country has left the mainland of Europe on precisely three prior occasions, each time carefully weighing up the costs and benefits before doing so.
In the Brexit of spring 1940, Britain politely declined to participate in a German-led effort toward European political union. In King Henry’s Brexit of 1534, the country sought to regain competitiveness by unshackling itself from the yoke of papal regulation. And in the original Brexit of 10,000–6,500 BC, the country prudently chose to increase border security, while at the same time putting its long-suffering fishermen back to work.
